It still seems that Cassius was just born a week ago. The trips to the nicu have all blurred together. Nurses all look the same to me now. I’ve waited 20 mins driving around the parking lot to make sure I get a spot that’s close to the entrance , and with shade. I’ve eaten terrible hospital cafeteria food, 4 bucks for a slice of pizza! Doctors come in and say, “Have any questions?”. Yeah when can we get the fuck out of here is the first one that comes to mind. I usually ask though if anything major has changed that we should be concerned about and I get the same answer. “No.” So if you’re wondering , like I have this past month, why the fuck are we here, this is the break down.

Preemies have all sorts of shit that need to develop. They didn’t have time to cook and mature in the womb and they have to do all that still. Doctors and nurses still go off our due date and still tell us it could take all the way up until then for him to go home. Preemies usually need help to breathe, have jaundice, can’t control their body temperature and can’t eat off a breast or bottle yet. So in order for a baby to go home they need to do all of that with no complications. By complications I mean heart rate has to stay at a certain level and oxygen levels have to stay at a certain amount or else these fucking machines go out and it takes everything in your not to smash the fucking thing and chuck it to the nearest staff person.

Luckily for us our son was off a breathing tube within a week, under the jaundice light for about the same amount of time. He’s been gaining weight steadily everyday and doctors are already talking about getting him to go home soon. Till next time everyone much love and take care.